The Heroic Role of Fathers in Breaking the Cycle

Black Boys Matter: The Vital Role of Fathers in Shaping the Future

The roles of gender in our varying societies, over the decades, have transformed significantly. It can be noted that the expectations outweigh the realities for both genders. It’s essential to examine these changes and consider both the gains and challenges.  As we celebrate Father’s Day, globally, I believe it is of utmost importance to recognize and honor the critical role fathers play in the lives of their sons, particularly Black boys. In a world that often undervalues and overlooks the contributions of fathers, it is paramount that we shed light on their profound impact and the importance of nurturing and supporting our boys.  Black boys matter and it begins with their fathers.

Since the beginning, men have been positioned as the heads of households and women as their “helpmate.” God told Adam, in Genesis, that He should not be alone as the animals all had a companion so He created the Genesis 2 – woman/helpmate – for Adam.  Now, because of a lack of understanding and misinterpretations, the potential of women was made to seem limited leading to what I call The Dreaded Feminist Movement.

While I understand why the movement could have been formed and agree with a small fraction of its morale such as: addressing misrepresentations that cause inequalities, advocating for the rights of women in employment, political representation, and education, the approach taken by some feminist “stands” have left a foul taste in my mouth.

•           I love it when my husband opens and closes my car door…

•           I love it when my husband opens the door for me and even other women when going into an establishment

•           I love when my husband comes home and he has a homecooked or otherwise meal on the table waiting for him

•           I appreciate doing his laundry, giving him massages, 

•           I appreciate him carrying my pocketbook/bag for me

•           I appreciate him taking in all the groceries

…simple things that are now scuffed on by modern-day “feminists” as I do not need a man to do that for me.  I, also, do not need a man to do that for me; however, I also have no problems if he does.  The truth is, that there has been a steady evolution in what is deemed the “traditional role” of the genders.  Men are now more domesticated and the household duties are more equitably distributed.  However, the shift has also impacted those boys/men who were raised as the primary providers causing what seems to be a rise in men relinquishing their roles as providers to more submissive or rejecting any form of responsibility. Who then is the “head of the household”?  There is no head, says some feminist stance, why can we not run the household together? That is what you are doing! But like in any organization or business, there needs to be an identified head/leader and in this business of marriage, parenting, and co-habitation, the male is designated the head/leader.

Society must recognize and address the mental, emotional, and spiritual challenges faced by men due to this shift in gender roles and provide a safe space for them to express these struggles.  Normalizing self-care and expression of emotions for me should be paramount in our society.  Educational and professional environments should promote a balanced approach, encouraging boys and young men to pursue a wide range of interests and careers, free from traditional gender expectations.

Do not get me wrong, the whole female empowerment movement brought about the presence of a more equitable society, but the importance of a clear distinction between gender roles is paramount to alleviating our boys feeling less than and more empowered to be men.

I believe it is essential that we openly honor the critical role fathers play in the lives of our Black boys who are often undervalued and overlooked for their contributions as fathers.

Black boys face unique challenges in society, including systemic racism, discrimination, and socioeconomic disparities, while the list is more extensive, the significant impact of the mentioned challenges affects the self-esteem, academic performance, and future opportunities of our black boys.  The role of their fathers play a crucial to provide them with the love, support, and guidance they need to navigate these obstacles and reach their full potential.

It has been proven that male role models, especially fathers, are instrumental in helping Black boys develop a strong sense of identity, self-worth, and resilience as they teach their sons valuable life skills, instill discipline, and offer a sense of security and belonging. By being present and involved, fathers help their sons build confidence and prepare them for successful futures.

Fathers play a multifaceted role in the development of their sons. 

•           They offer emotional support

•           They are their role models

•           They offer discipline

•           They create structure

•           They motivate

•           They encourage

•           They offer academic support

Now we know that there are some “sperm donors” who are just “hit and runs” – we pray that they will step into their roles and that the Holy Spirit will awaken their fraternal instinct so that they will understand the damage they are doing to their sons and get involved in the lives of the next generation of me; but for those men that support our black boys and play the vital roles they need in their of fashioning them into men that will not relinquish their roles as “the head and not the tail, above and not beneath…” I applaud and celebrate you.

Father’s Day is that time that we set aside to celebrate and honor you who make a difference in the lives of your sons. It’s a time to acknowledge your sacrifices, dedication, and the love you provide that will create an atmosphere of strengthening and support for the families they will one day create.

Let us pay homage to all fathers who stand by their sons, guiding them, supporting them, and helping them become the men they are promised to be. Let us stand to recognize the crucial role they play in creating a better future for all children, but especially Black boys, who need their father’s presence and wisdom more than ever.  Fathers matter, boys matter, and together, they form the foundation of a strong and resilient society.

To all the fathers who are daily making a difference in the lives of their families and especially their black sons. Your role is, incomparable, and invaluable, and your impact is immeasurable.  YOU ROCK! And our world will be better because of your service and dedication.

This article aims to emphasize the importance of Black boys, the pivotal role of fathers, and the celebration of fatherhood, recognizing the positive contributions fathers make to their families and society.